Selectively Juggling

I’m in the field of helping people address their fears, trauma, loss, anger and unmet needs and dreams. However, I haven’t always heeded my own professional advice. That all changed within a crystalline moment , when I realised I was coauthor of my life. If I wanted a different story arc, scene, characterisation and plot, then it was up to me to embrace my own sense of agency and effect the changes I craved. It changed when I realised that I am the common denominator in every single one of my relationships, and that this meant I needed to focus on my responses, and on how I behaved. It changed when I realised that ‘I AM WORTHY’ of love, respect and success. Yes, I grew up knowing the hardships associated with poverty and compounded family loss and traumas. However, I also grew up learning about resilience, sensitivities and perseverance.

I changed the way I saw the world and myself; and the way I moved within it. I embodied the metaphor of being like the camera lens. I focused on what I choose to see, refocusing my lens when I lose clarity of thought and vision.

I also realised that I am unique and have a unique worldview, one that is neurodiverse. I leaned into both my cerebral and visceral intelligences, and my strength to observe people, patterns and the world around me. I literally embraced my differences, and stopped making excuses, or trying to mask simply to appease others. I learned to finally accept, love and celebrate me. A significant flow on effect, has been that it further enabled me to open my mind and heart to the differences and vulnerabilities of others.