Selectively Juggling

Like many others (or so I imagine) I would readily go back in time to visit my younger self. However, having said that I wouldn’t wish to relive those parts of my life again, but rather gently counsel and influence how I saw myself, others, and perceived life. I would whisper words of encouragement, trying to remove the shackles of anxiety, perfectionism, low self esteem and the effects of trauma. I would try to encourage deeper awe, wonder and presentism. Ultimately, aiming to help foster a deeper sense of self-efficacy, personal agency and quiet confidence. I would tell myself that it’s okay to fly under the radar, but it’s also okay to dance in my own light. I would whisper words of encouragement, especially in terms of recognising my unique gifts and sensitivities. I would stress to myself “don’t ever feel you need to dumb down your intelligence or dull your sparkle and unique quirks for anyone ” . I would tell my small child self “ you’ve got this girl, you’re strong, intelligent, funny and compassionate but don’t feel you need to fix everything and everyone, you’re just a little girl” Then, I would leave myself to find my own path through life, hopefully with a deeper understanding of my own worth, potential and strength. Perhaps this would help me to evolve into a well-adjusted, thoughtful woman who knew her real power, and wasn’t afraid of failure or success. There is one particular moment I would revisit though, when I was 18 I took my sisters to a concert. I had to do some fast talking to get my sisters (aged 14 & 16) into the concert. Anyway after the concert we walked over the Sydney Harbour Bridge and felt invincible. I wish I could have been a passer by , smiling at myself and stopping to take a photo of the 3 beautiful girls who were living the perfect moment. Isn’t life like a string of moments, suspenseful over the abyss of time?